So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Randomize
