You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize