i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
either way he was missing a nipple.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
