My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
