This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Randomize
