Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Randomize
