Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
