Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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