i barfeds in our rink
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
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