You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
