so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize