So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
