____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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