So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize
