Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
