i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
honey bunches of taint.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
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