somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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