erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Randomize
