I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
how drunk are you?
Several
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Randomize
