How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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