I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Randomize
