I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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