Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
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