You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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