so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
