If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize