I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
