this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Still dying that you shit outside
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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