I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Are my feet made of real feet?
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize
