Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
