I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Randomize
