Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
