May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
