it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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