WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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