i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
