k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
