mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I need a beard to bite.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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