I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
