Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Randomize
