i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
