This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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