what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Randomize
