i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
