Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
420 ftw
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
