i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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