I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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