I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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