The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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