i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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